So what is dirty? Other than your laundry, though you may feel shamefaced by that too. You must have examples jumping to your mind, I know you do, let them arrive. Perhaps dirty is that affair you had, or wish you’d had. Maybe it is the sexuality beyond the sexuality you profess to your partner, the things you would really like to do. Dirty could be your guilt. The thing you said, the way you said it. Your truest dirt may be found in a web of lies and misgivings that you tell the world, that you tell yourself. Maybe your dirt is the grit under your nails, the art you create, and the food you prepare, full fat and astonishing. Your dirty is your humanity. It may be discovered holed up with a host of emotions, lust, greed, passion, excitement, love, hunger, fear, hate, adoration, expectation, envy, empathy… Your dirt, your filth is not the excrement of life, but the enacting of it. The things you regret, the things you most certainly don’t. It is our dark. It is that which captures you even when you try, so hard, to turn from it. It is the dark night of the soul, the questions of existence that sneak up and choke you. It is the fireworks set off, on magical occasion, to enlighten your being.
Whilst divinity… That is allegedly something altogether other. It is the connection to a truer, higher, less than human self. Your divinity is purportedly unsullied, it is prayer, incense and magic. It is your connection to intuition. It is not all ‘the light’ though. That is a myth. It is the depth of feeling, the karma, the justice meted out against all you have felt and done. Divine is your feeling of ‘something more’, your inner knowing, the light at the corner of your eye, the shadow at the end of your bed. Divinity was birthing your children, or losing your mother, or finding a lost lover. It was what you learned, how it shook you, where it took you, emotionally, spiritually, transcendentally. It is the shimmer of enlightenment that raises you up and bounces off your well-intentioned words of comfort and love. Divine is unseen, harder to grasp, but you are a woman, you need not see it, you need simply feel it. Allow yourself to feel it.
Alice Grist is a bestselling spiritual author, artist, tarot professional and mother of two young girls. Her work (in all it’s forms) focuses on empowering real modern women to their intuitive spirit.
Find her at www.alicegrist.co.uk